google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
