I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
