I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
