And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
