He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
