Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
