She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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