His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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