I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
