So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
