so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
