I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
