you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
