dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
