Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Randomize
