Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
