she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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