I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
