But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
