Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
