if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I'm too high and old for this...
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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