Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize
