i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
