I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize