I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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