Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
