he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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