Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
