I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
