drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
