U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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