she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Also, beer. Big fan.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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