Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
