Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Randomize