i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
