some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
