I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
