There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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