I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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