Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
