your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
