But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
