i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
where are my eyebrows?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
