By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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