Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
