The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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