u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
