Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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