what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
