Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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