Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize